Kisah teladan #1

Once I went on a vacation to Holland with a few friends. For two weeks, we rented a car and drove all over the country. We didn't really have a specific plan. We sort of pinpointed the towns we wanted to visit and once we arrived there, all we had to do was explore. Many houses provided B&B facilities so lodging was never a problem. Well come to think of it some of the most beautiful places we discovered in that country was purely by chance when we got lost. Like the Isle of Kaag. Google Image it and you'll see. It's such a gem.

One afternoon we were having lunch in a restaurant in one of the towns. I can't remember which one. We sat outside to enjoy the view of the buildings around us and also to eyeball all the passers-by. Orang Belanda ni ramai yang tinggi-tinggi. Tak kira lelaki mahupun perempuan. And many of them were taller than I. That made me feel right at home. Nobody staring at you for being this freakishly tall long-limbed girl walking clumsily around the shopping mall. In fact here in Holland if you're, say, 5 feet tall, with short stumpy legs, saya nasihatkan duduk rumah je la because the Dutch people might just grab you and make you their garden gnome. Oh yes. Another wonderful thing to see in Holland is their love and pride for their gardens and greens.

Well anyway back to the lunch story. Sedang kami asyik makan tengahari dan menikmati pemandangan, kami dikejutkan dengan suara orang-orang bercakap di dalam Bahasa Inggeris yang bertelo Melayu. Cepat-cepat saya beritahu kawan saya, "Eh let's speak in French so that they won't know we're from Malaysia too. Leceh la nanti nak kena berborak-borak dengan depa."

True enough the minute they saw us they started staring to see if we were also from Malaysia Tanahair Tercinta. Jadi kami pun bercakap-cakaplah dalam Bahasa Perancis. Konon menyamar. Cakap punya cakap gelak punya gelak saya ter"lebih uja" (is that how you translate over excited?) dan terhantuk kepala di tiang bersegi di belakang saya. Sakitnya bukan main.

"ADOI!!!"

Hence my cover-up was exposed.

The moral of the story?

Ko kalau dah Jawa tu Jawa jugaklah. Sedar diri tu sikit. :)

Ngeh ngeh ngeh.

20.10.2010

Today on FB many of my friends have mentioned this date as "nombor cantik". For me it's just a number but it got me thinking. What did I do during this day the past couple of years?

So just now I checked my phone calendar and office organizer. It seems that on 20.10.2008 I had class during the day and dinner with my girlfriends in the evening Most probably after doing a dance class at the gym in the hopes of trying to shed off the kilos I piled on during Hari Raya Aidilfitri. I think on that day we were still in the month of Syawal, so I am guessing that I might have gone a little overboard with the food consumption.

On 20.10.2009 I also had class (tugas hakiki will always be tugas hakiki) and at night I went to the local music shop to inquire about piano lessons. Now that I remember I'm cringing a little because I stopped going for piano lessons after only 6 months of classes. My piano teacher gave up on me after two polite phone call reminders and she has accepted the fact that I enthusiastically took up lessons in the beginning simply because they were having a grand sale at Yamaha Music in Kelana Jaya when I bought my electric piano and its price was super marked down. Plus I just got paid for some translation job. Plus the lessons were also paid by a friend as a belated birthday gift.

So today, on 20.10.2010, I don't foresee anything special. I have a class in awhile, in the afternoon I might have to go to the workshop for some car check-up. Oh yes and wish happy birthday to a few friends who were born on this day many moons ago.

Dan buat apa lagi ye? Maybe buy a pink guitar and take up guitar lessons pulak? :)

Kejadian di farmasi

Last week I went to the pharmacy to buy some stuff and at the cashier, while waiting for my turn to pay, I thought of buying some mint candies as well. But that meant leaving my queue for awhile. Tapi tak payah sebenarnya cos usually they put all the candies and sweets and lozenges right in front of the cashier and if your hands are long enough you can grab some while in line.

Well anyway I was about to get those candies when a little kid (maybe around 6 years old at the most) came and stood right in front of the shelf. Exactly at the spot where they had the mint candies. So I politely asked the boy to move a little to the side, just for awhile, so that I can pick and choose and get back to my queue.

Anak mat salleh tu just ignored me.

OK. Takpe.

I tapped on his shoulder lightly and said again, "Excuse me, can you move a bit please? I need to get those mint candies."

Then he looked up at me and said, "Lady, you can suck my dick."

HUH? I was so shocked that my jaw literally dropped for a few seconds. Literally. And I actually looked around the pharmacy to see if this was some kind of hidden camera prank or something. I just couldn't imagine a kid with such a cherubic face saying that to a grown up. And I was too gobsmacked to think of a reply. Takkan nak cari gaduh dengan budak kecik ? You pick someone your own size lah kan.

Anyway his mom saved the day by calling him from outside to leave.

No, seriously, you call that a dick? A silly willy maybe, or a wriggly tadpole, but a dick? That little kid's got guts.

Nuffnang

A few nights ago a friend of mine suggested that I include the nuffnang click button icon in my blog and hopefully make some money out of it. To be honest I don't really know how it works. But I just had it done anyway. My brother said that if someone clicks on it to see the advertisement, a certain amount of money will go into my account. I am guessing a few cents.

So I was like wondering if I kept clicking on the nuffnang button repeatedly all day long I'd become extremely rich very fast and not have to join the login-FB-and-get-RM100 bandwagon. And can finally quit my job, buy a nice house, have a gorgeous kitchen with a 12 foot long kitchen island (what the hell?) and do nothing except eat and be merry. And from time to time spend my vacation at my villa in Monaco, sipping Perrier by my infinity pool and watch my neighbour Kimi Raikkonen clean his (he finds pool cleaning relaxing for the soul and therapeutic; it keeps his mind focused for his next race).

Then my brother told me that they check the IP address of each ''clicker''. So only the first click counts. Or so I think.

OWHHH. Takde la kaya cepat ek?

If this was the road runner show, the broken edge of the cliff would have landed on Wiley E. Coyote's head right now. And ruin all his plans.

Tapi kalau saya tunggu lama-lama sikit dan suruh semua orang yang saya kenal klik butang nuffnang di blog saya ni lama-lama dapat tak saya beli Mini Cooper yang saya idam-idamkan selama ini?

Owh okay. An Iphone 4 maybe? Would that be a more achievable target?

Errr...itu pun tak pasti? Then what about a trip to the islands? They say the sands on the beaches of some little islands off Langkawi are so fine and white it's like walking on flour.

Apa? Jangan harap sangat? Isyyy...when you start having monologues with Negativity, you'll never get anywhere.

Belum cuba belum tahu. Masa pakcik Moh Far Kor letak muka dia on his first packet of asam limau keping more than 30 years ago, did he know that his product would still be around in 2010? Remember those days when people would scare you from eating it and call the asam taik hidung Cina? It still sticks in my mind until now.

Oh well anyway back to my Nuffnang deal. Let's be more optimistic. A trip to the Bahamas guys. That's what I'm aiming for. I'll start prepping myself up for it with a short weekend trip to PD in November. You know, just to get a feel of the breeze and salt water.

Lawatan ke kilang Denso

Yesterday I had an appointment to visit an MFI student who was doing her industrial training in Denso at 10am. By 9.30 I had already driven into the factory compound and parked near the security booth to register myself. Sambil merasa kagum dengan diri sendiri kerana sampai begitu awal sekali.

At the pondok pak guard I told the man that I was there to see my student and gave him her name. He called in to check dan beberapa saat kemudian muka dia berkerut. Then he asked me if I knew anyone working there in the factory. So I gave him the name of the HR person. Lagi dia buat muka pelik. I started to feel annoyed. Kenapa pakcik ni semua orang dia tak kenal. Cubalah update sikit senarai staf beserta nombor extension tu boleh tak? Daripada duduk-duduk melenggang perut tak buat apa-apa.

And then he looked at me again and asked me one more time, "Akak sebenarnya nak jumpa siapa?"

Dan saya terpaksa menjawab sekali lagi, "Saya ni datang nak melawat pelajar MFI yang buat latihan industri kat kilang Denso ni."

Kemudian terdengar suara seorang pekerja kilang tersebut yang lalu di belakang saya berkata, "Kak Long ni kilang Sony."

Oh. Kilang Denso terletak bersebelahan rupanya.

Lawatan ke kilang Hitachi

Last Friday I went to Hitachi Electronics here in Bangi for the first time. I had to go there to visit a student who's currently doing his industrial training in that company. At the security booth, I had to register myself and surrender my driving license. I was given a vendor pass and showed the way to the visitor parking. Then I had to use the supplier entrance, which is rupa-rupanya not the proper main entrance. Since I had the vendor tag on me, that's the entrance that I had to take. They didn't have any Cikgu Bahasa Perancis yang menyamar sebagai vendor entrance.

As I entered, I was surprised to see so many people coming and going into the three corridors that divided the ground floor. Ramai sangat gadis-gadis muda. And they all looked at me and smiled. Then I realized something.

They were all five feet tall or less.

Do you all realize how tiny all these foreign female workers are? I was literally swarmed by them. Imagine a birthday cake with one tall candle sticking out of it. That was how I felt. I was lost in a sea of Indonesian midgets.

And to put the cherry on the top of the proverbial cake, upon leaving, when the security guard handed me back my driving license, he actually gave me a pantun dua kerat.

"Terima kasih daun keladi
Kalau senang datang lagi"

Part of their KPI perhaps? I'm impressed. And highly amused. :-)

How do you mend a broken heart?

I am now experiencing severe withdrawal of the chemicals dopamine and oxytocin, short circuiting my brains, resulting in high amounts of cortisol in my body. I am running low on happy hormones. My trust hormone is at sub-zero level. As such, I am constantly feeling fatigued and sleepy. I am guessing this is my body's defense mechanism against heartbreak. Maybe if I went to sleep, all my worry will go away.

Alas that is never the case. I wake up at odd hours during the night, always feeling a tightness in my chest. Sometimes it is hard for me to breathe. I just want to lie in bed all day. And sleep. But I can't. My evil buddy insomnia is throwing my sleep cycle off.

And my tear ducts work overtime.

But I am patiently waiting for this depressing cycle to end. And bounce back to my normal self. I am very fortunate to be surrounded by friends and family who are understanding enough to let me be without asking too many questions, offer advice when needed, and be there for me. It's heartwarming to know that there are still some people who love you.

The trick is to stay occupied. And always have faith in the Almighty that when something happens, it is always for a reason. He knows what's best for you. Right now I might just feel like kicking his ass for giving up so easily, but I'm sure in the long run, in perspective, I might just begin to fathom the scheme of things. How maybe I was not meant to be in this kind of life. Or simply that if a person ditches you at the slightest obstacle and not want to find other means and ways, well then maybe he was just not so into you after all.

Do I have the face that says ''The fun starts here. Please wash hands after use. Thank you and have a nice day''?

Do I not deserve some love and happiness as well? And some degree of respect?

Freud has long suggested writing about any deep traumatizing episode you might have experienced for the cathartic effect. Ceh gila bombastic punya ayat padahal it just means writing crap about some shitty thing to let off some steam. So here I am trying to let go of some of my ''deep negative emotions that I might ignore or repress'' through expressive writing. Bluek.

Well for whatever that has happened, when all else fails, I still have my faith, my family, my friends, my cats and my wacky sense of humor.

And to the person responsible for all this extreme sadness and unhappiness, would it be possible for me to claim damages? If you think a broken heart is just some foolish romantic notion, well think again. I have to live with all this physical pains and aches in my body and it is taking a toll on my health and sanity. Kalau kita demam, kita boleh pergi klinik dan minta panadol (kalau tak nak bayar kena cari klinik panel), tapi kalau kita patah hati, ada tak hospital yang buat injection anti-kecewa?

I know you are reading this. Yes. You. So tell me, where is the nearest hospital I can go to check myself in and ask for dopamin and oxytocin I.Vs? That would help clear this blur in my head. And ease the pain a little.

But so would an unlimited spending budget.