PYT

Yesterday on the way home from Bangi I stopped by a petrol station. And as fate would have had it, a familiar looking car stopped at the pump beside mine and out came this guy who I know very well since I used to date him. And a few seconds after that out came a young girl, who I shall refer to as PYT (Pretty Young Thing dan bukan kedai emas Poh Yik Thye). The guy I used to date (TGIUTD) saw me and naturally we said hi to each other and talked nonsense. What else is there to talk about when you have crossed out love/future plans/marriage/being together/weekend lepaks/common activities that all amounts to zero time spent together? Nothing.

PYT didn't like seeing him talking to another woman. So before you could finish saying TGIUTD she was stuck to his side like annoying Uhu. And she uttered the four words yang bila keluar sahaja dari mulutnya aku rasa macam ada volcano erupting in slo mo di depan mata.

"Siapa perempuan tinggi ni Yang?"
Ok sorry. Five words.

A tomcat will pee at the four corners of the house to mark his territory. A PYT who is unsure of her opponent right in front of her will try to ignore the existence of the latter through the use of the third person singular. And then claim her right on the man by clinging on to his neck and talking in a girly voice with maximum pout effect. Aku pun boleh la kalau nak buat macam tu. Cuma masalahnya nanti orang akan panggil polis. Itu je. Sebab nampak mencuakkan.

Namun saya akur dengan kebesaran Tuhan apabila berhadapan dengan PYT. God shows us His miracles in many little ways. When I look at her I say to myself, "Wah! Papan plywood pun boleh berkata-kata."

Oh come on. We want a full D or E. Not some pre-pubescent training Bee Dees. And As and Bs are only good for exams honey.

Muahaha.

N/B: The writer has since taken her medication and is now in stable condition and is able to control her neurotic behavior. The voices in her head have also quietened down.