Thursday, May 12, 2011

Baking show on TV

Last night I arrived home late after one hour of combat martial arts followed by a light dinner with girlfriends. After taking a nice cool shower I switched on the telly to wind down a bit, sambil memakan aiskrim Magnum Classic yang sungguh lazat.

There was this interesting cooking programme on Astro. The chef was showing how to bake a meringue. Or Bomb Alaska. I think. I was trying to jot down the ingredients and at the same time watch her do all the baking steps and try to hold on to my ice-cream.

And at the part where the chef said, "Now please be careful here when you bla bla bla..." and I was heavily concentrating to not miss any crucial part (with my ice-cream stick in mid-air) my big orange cat dengan sungguh selambanya berjalan di hadapan skrin televisyen, berhenti di tengah-tengah, mengiau beberapa ketika, dan meneruskan perjalanan untuk pergi baring betul-betul di sebelah kanan televisyen.

And thus ended my interrupted baking lesson.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Perbualan di muka pintu bilik peperiksaan

-Why are you out so early? This paper ends in one hour's time. You have one hour more to go.
-Alah madame, susah sangat la, kalau duduk lama-lama pun bukannya dapat idea baru pun.
-Oh. OK.
-Jom la madame saya belanja madame teh tarik.
-Orait. Tapi tunggu la saya jaga exam ni sampai 2.30pm. Awak yang keluar awal.
-Oh ye tak ye jugak.
-Alamak lamanya lagi. Saya balik dulu la madame. Panas.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Industrial training presentation #1

This morning I had an industrial training presentation to attend. The student came in, set up the computer, showed his slides and started his presentation.

-Good morning. My name is bla bla bla and today I will present. First I will talk about the company then I will talk about the project.

All the lecturers nodded.

-First the company. Bla bla bla...

The lecturers nodded.

-So my conclusion is bla bla bla.

The lecturers looked at each other. Did we miss something out here? Were we abducted by aliens before he started talking about his project and were beamed back into the room in time to hear his conclusions? Did I suddenly fall asleep?

-May I ask you where are your slides for your industrial training project?
-Oh madame, hilang la madame. Masa edit malam tadi terdelete.
-Okayyy...what about your industrial training report? Maybe you can show us something and explain from there.
-Tak bawak la madame. (read: tak siap lagi)
-All rightey....what about pictures? Can you show us some of the pictures you took of the machines and explain to us what you did?
-Gambar dalam laptop madame. Tapi kat rumah.

Kalau ada pertandingan "Rebutlah Peluang Untuk Mendapat Markah Gagal Di dalam Industrial Training Presentation", this boy would've won hands down. Blind-folded. Strapped in a straight jacket. Dan mendapat undian SMS tertinggi dari para penonton.