Friday, September 18, 2015

Missed call

I got a missed called from an unknown number early this morning.
So I called back.

  • Assalamualaikum. I got a missed call from this number. 
  • Waalaikumussalam. Oh ye ek.
  • Yes. May I know who this is?
  • A Muslim.
  • Ok....may I have a name?
  • This handphone belongs to A Muslim.
  • Sigh. Mine too. Oh! Are you one of my students?
  • Yes madame! Ini handphone A Muslim. Ahmad Muslim. Dia tengah drive ni.

*talking in background*

  • Madame! Muslim cakap sori. Dia tertekan nombor madame.
  • OK.
  • Dia cakap hello jugak.
  • Ok hello.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Pet talk

A few days ago I met up with a few friends for coffee and a little discussion. One of my friends brought along his elderly uncle.

After the short discussion we chatted a bit and came to the topic of pets. Everybody at the table were animal lovers and each one owned a pet or two so we sort of  ''updated the statuses'' of all the pets.

I told them about mine. The elderly uncle asked what animals I had at home. So I told him that I currently only have two 12 year old cats. I wanted to call them my geriatric babies tapi nasib baik sempat tahan diri sebab nanti takut elderly uncle tu kecik hati dan ingat saya perli dia. Tapi memang betul kucing-kucing saya tu dah tua. So old that when I go to bed at night I will just take either Tina or Momoi to be my hot water bottle because all the do is sleep sleep sleep. And they happily oblige.

The elderly uncle asked me what other pets I used to have. So I told him about Jimmy Snail, my pet siput and Agus our pet turtle. Tapi dua-dua dah tak ada. We kinda miss Agus because even if he was just a turtle and muka takde perasaan but still he seemed happy when anyone got home. Food source home, tummy happy. Bersemangat saya bercerita pasal Agus. Uncle hanya mendengar sambil tersenyum.

So kita pun borak-borak sikit dalam setengah jam. Then the elderly uncle apologized and said he had to leave. And thanked us for keeping him company sambil minum kopi.

When the old man left, I quickly turned to my friend and said, ''Nasib baik aku tak cakap kucing aku geriatric. Kalau tak mesti your uncle will feel offended.''

My friend replied, "Memang la ko tak sebut pasal kucing ko tua. Tapi ko tau tak? Nama uncle aku  tu Agus."

So I got up, went to the corner of the room and kicked myself.

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

New speakers

Yesterday I had some problems setting up my laptop in class. I had just bought a new set of speakers and was struggling to get any sound come out of them. I restarted, unplugged the cables, plugged them back on, tried again. Still nothing.

Then of the students who were sitting in front offered to help. I explained to him lengthily about my issue and offered some possibilities as to why this might have happened. Faulty speakers, virus infection, media player not functioning properly, jerebu, bad hair day bla bla bla.

He came to my table, looked at the screen, turned up the laptop volume which was on mute, smiled at me, and went back to his seat.

His friend sitting next to him said,"It's OK madame. My mother also like dat. She say donno why, when I check she forget to on something.''

''Ada sekali tu she open fridge but tak tau kenapa.''


''Madame pun like dat kan?"

snigger snigger


''OK OK sorry madame.''

namun gelak kecil masih kedengaran

Monday, September 14, 2015

It runs in the family

  • Mak Long saya memang nak sangat masuk sekolah asrama.
  • Kenapa?
  • Sebab semua orang dalam keluarga kita masuk asrama: Atok, Tok Ayah, Mak Long, Mummy, Daddy, Pak Su, Mak Su.
  • So?
  • Jadi saya pun nak buktikan yang saya pun boleh berjaya macam semua ahli keluarga.
  • Aina...tak semestinya kalau tak masuk asrama tu tak pandai.
  • Tapi saya tak nak ketinggalan. Saya pun nak masuk asrama macam orang lain. Saya perlu terus nyalakan OBOR-OBOR tradisi keluarga Mak Long!

Rupanya kami ni keluarga SpongeBob.