Thursday, August 5, 2010

Masa tu you kurus

Yesterday we had the pleasure of receiving our new Chairman of the Board of Directors of MFI at our campus. During his visit to the institute we were treated to a video presentation of MFI and the staff.

In one of the animated slide shows, they showed pictures of the staff taken during the 2008 Aidilfitri gathering. Then my colleague who was sitting beside me elbowed me and said, "Ehh, itu gambar you Tie. Masa tu you kurus!"

If I had chosen to be in my self-denial mode, I would've loved to think that she was implying that I am now "lebih kurus" compared to that 2008 photo.

But of course I know better. After countless remarks which range from "Madame nampak bulat la muka tu." to "Ko macam dah gemuk sikit Tie ek?" I have come to realize that all this extra weight that I feel on my body did not come from the new red specs or extra rings that I am wearing on my finger. And maybe it's high time time that I do something about it.

So now I am thinking of a master plan for my new weight loss program while munching on my second kuih keria. Sedap betul kuih ni. Deep fried and dipped in sugar syrup. My safety blanket in times of need.

But how can you not like Fat/Oil/Gula and depend on them for some quiet reassurance? They even make up the words G-O-O-D F-O-O-D. Right?

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Atan buat hal lagi

Last Tuesday on the way to work my car died on me. Well, not really. The engine was still running but when I pressed on the accelerator it just wouldn't move. So I slowly swerved to the side and stopped the car. I put the gear into Neutral. Waited for a while. Then changed it back to Drive. Didn't move. Then switched it to Reverse. Nothing.

A few phone calls later and I was alone waiting for help. Again. Dah dua kali Atan buat hal (panggilan manja kepada kereta ku bila ia meragam. Bila dia OK saya memanggilnya Betty). The first time was last Friday. At that time sudah keluar tanda-tanda kecil keretaku perlu ditukar. Kali ini mungkin sudah muncul tanda besar kot.

Tapi seperti biasa sempat jugalah saya ber FB memberi status update terkini dan meminta tolong sesiapa memberitahu para pelajar yang saya terpaksa membatalkan kelas. Menurut laporan yang diterima, mereka meloncat-loncat kegirangan.

A few minutes had passed when I saw a PLUS Peronda truck stop behind me. One of them came out and walked towards Atan. Whoa. Tinggi. Pakai Rayban. Pakai uniform. Muka serius. At that moment I imagined him strutting in slo mo. Alaaa gaya-gaya robot terminator jahat yang pakai unform polis dan kuat lari tu kan?

He looked at my car and asked me what happened. I was just about to explain everything when my girlfriend arrived with two mechanics. So tengok-tengok-godek-godek and initial diagnosis was that it could be a gearbox problem. So abang polis Peronda PLUS had to tow my car slowly to the nearest toll (Bangi) before it could get towed to the workshop.

Semasa berada di dalam kereta saya semasa kereta saya ditarik, macam-macam nasihat yang diberikan kepada saya (one of them drove the truck and the other drove my car). Lega saya. Muka mereka berdua nampak sangat serius akan tetapi mereka peramah juga rupanya. Mungkin tadi muka berkerut sebab cuaca di luar agak panas.

Setibanya di tol Bangi, mereka menarik kereta saya ke tepi. Sebelum cakap babai saya terfikir untuk mengambil gambar bersama dua abang polis tinggi ini. Hero-hero lebuhraya yang telah menolong saya disaat memerlukan. Saya membuka mulut dan berkata "Encik!". Kedua-dua menoleh ke arah saya. Muka mereka nampak garang semula.

"Ya?"
"Errr..terima kasih ya."
"Sama-sama."

Aku gugup!

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Monday, August 2, 2010

Aku tau la

Just now during French class we did a bit of oral Q&A in class to put into practice what we have done so far.

Madame Yati to student A: Tu t'appelles comment? (What is your name?)
Student A to student B: Pssst...madame suruh aku buat apa tu?
Student B to student A: Madame suruh ko gi tandas (quiet laughter in the background; nak gelak kuat-kuat takut madame Yati marah)
Student A to student B: Ek eleh nak menipu tu agak-agak ah. Aku tau la....

And student A went to the front of the classroom to erase the white board.

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